Dog Eat Dog

Confession: I make our pets work for their keep.

Have your kids ever asked you for a pet? A dog, a cat, perhaps a ferret even? Let me guess, they promise that they will bear the sole responsibility for the care of this pet. They swear on Dora The Explorer, or Bratz, or Spiderman, or whoever they are into at that moment, that they will care for it and give it all of the attention it needs. This my friends is probably a lie.
"I swear I will walk it" -No they won't. At least not if there is something better to do.
"I promise I will feed it" -No they won't. Well, perhaps on occasion. Although if left to their feeding schedule the animal will likely be found out back by the shed emaciated and gasping for water.
"It can sleep with me in my bed" No it won't. Maybe this will happen on the first night or two and then you will be met by cries of "get it out of here it smells/ is too hairy/ has stinky breath"

And so who gets to step up and feed/walk/ clean-up after the pets that you probably didn't even want in the first place? In fairness, hubby has to bear the brunt of the doggy-care responsibilities in order for them to continue to live healthy and productive lives here in our house. I might be likely to forget the occasional feeding, or six.
In our case it is not one but two dogs, and a few hermit crabs as well (I refuse to touch those). And while I feel good in the fact that we did rescue both dogs from shelters, I still can not believe that I signed on to care for 2 dogs in addition to my 3 children!

And so the only way I can justify having them around is by using them as cheap (actually free) labor. I use them in lieu of a broom or mop after meals. They do a great job after food has been dropped, or even thrown onto the floor. I use them in lieu of a vacuum cleaner. I just let them follow the kids around any time they are moving about the house with any type of snack item. This works well with non-food items too as dogs are not very selective. I have even on occasion used them in lieu of a washcloth or dishrag to wipe up the highchair after the baby has eaten. They are all too happy to lick the thing clean.

And before you tell me how gross this is, I should tell you that the baby has moved to a booster seat now, so we don't even use the highchair anymore. ;) Anyway, I read somewhere that dogs mouths are cleaner than people's mouths anyway... and everything you see in print just has to be true... right?