Confession: Sometimes I really, really need a break from the kids.
I love my kids. I adore my kids. The happiness and well-being of my children are my top priority. I am sure most moms reading along with my musings all this time, probably feel the same, or close to it anyway. So, I have to ask, why do we so often feel guilty if we want or need time away from our kids? Why are we taken to task by some about our 'parenting commitment' or our 'family values'? It is ridiculous I tell you.
I tell you boldly that I want some time away from my kids! Yes, I think that it is perfectly acceptable, dare I say even necessary, for a woman to have portions of her life, of her self, that are separate from that which she shares with her children. This is not a sin. This is not bad parenting. In fact I think it is quite the contrary. I think a little 'me' time every once in a while makes a much more happy, secure, focused mommy!
I am not talking about two weeks alone in the south of France. I am talking about an hour or two to go out to dinner or for coffee with the girls, a few hours a week to go to the gym (ha ha but who does that, right?), or just some time to take a bath, read a book, or as I've said before, watch an uninterrupted segment of American Idol. Is this really too much to ask?
Apparently for some moms, it is. My hubby is petty good about this stuff, in as much as I will usually get an 'ok' if I prearrange. But, he still needs a little work. I think they all do. There is an undeniable guilt factor that many woman (myself included) feel when they are out on their own, or doing something that does not somehow relate to their homes or their family. I am here to tell you that it is OKAY to take a little time to just be who you are. Time not to be Mrs. so and so, or so and so's mommy; time to just be Michelle, or Susan, or Kim, or whoever who are/were before you had kids.
I knew it was dramatically apparent that we as moms were getting desperate for time away, when my cousin told me that she was excited about her upcoming gynecologist appointment because it meant that she could leave hubby with their two kids for a couple of hours. Now this is desperation people! Heck we've gotten to the point where we are satisfied when our 'me time' is made up of grocery shopping, doctor's visits, heck even dental work is seeming appealing to some at this point.
This is not acceptable! So I would ask you, implore you, to take time out this weekend to do something that is JUST for you. Take an afternoon, an hour, or 10 minutes, but do one thing that you can completely and totally claim as your own. Then let me know if it doesn't make you feel at least a little bit better!
TGIF everyone.
Friday, April 11, 2008
So, it's come to this...
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3 comments:
Did you read my post about my birthday present? It happened - I will be getting an entire weekend to myself as my present this year!!! On May 17th I will leave the house in the morning and not come home until around dinner time the next day.
Obviously, I have NO problem speaking up about my need for time to NOT be the Mommy. :)
Good luck getting out alone this weekend!
I applaud you. This needed to be said. We all do need and deserve our own "Me" time. We shouldn't feel guilty. Me time makes me a better mother, and wife. I am planning a shopping trip later on in the month with a friend. Just me and her, and a whole day of fun. I cannot wait. And I bet that I'll come back a much happier Mommy and Wife. Me time makes everyone happy.
Right On!!! Let me know how the me time thing works out, as I have to cart an 4 year old ADHD boy child around with me to doctor's appointments and Diva's softball practices while husband works all weekend. I do, however, have a night out next Friday to see the Billy Joel concert ~ I'm counting the seconds to that one.
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